One of my favorite web sites to turn to over these past few years has been a site called Aleph Beta. The teachings are amazing and presented in a way that is deep yet engaging and easy to follow. Rabbi Foreman is the lead Rabbi and he has been gifted with an amazing ability to understand the Word, see things that most of us would read right past, and present his teachings in the humblest way. One of the ways he likes to lead his students to something is using the game from Sesame Street called “which of these things isn't like the others?”. So, in the spirit of respect, I am going to borrow this game first from Sesame Street, and secondly from Rabbi Foreman.
As I read Galatians 5:22-23 I come across one of the “fruit of the
Spirit” that just seems out of place. Let’s
take a look together. Which on of these things isn't like the others?:
They are: Love, Joy, Peace,
Longsuffering, Gentleness, Goodness, Faith, Meekness, Temperance (self-cntrol).
(KJV)
In most the other versions I have read I am finding that “Longsuffering”
has been replaced with “Patience”. I can
totally understand this. Even if the
proper and most accurate reading is “Longsuffering”, it really just doesn’t
seem to belong. Even to the point that
very possibly most translators have substituted in a much gentler form of the
word being “patience”.
But what exactly is expressed in “longsuffering” that “patience”
just does not capture?
I have to believe that this is something that the Holy Spirit is
really working with me on. If “Longsuffering”
truly is the better definition, I would propose that it is a balance to the
other fruit. One of my favorite concepts
in the walking out of our Christian experience is the progression of three
scriptures. They are:
Galatians 5:22-23 (KJV) “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering,
gentleness, goodness, faith, Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.”,
John 8:32 (KJV) “And ye shall know
the truth, and the truth shall make you free.”
Romans 12:1-2 (KJV) “I beseech you
therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a
living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, [which is] your reasonable
service. And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the
renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what [is] that good, and acceptable,
and perfect, will of God.”
When combined I like to think of it
this way:
I use the fruit of the Spirit to
check my current temperament, mood, and emotions. If I am anything outside the “fruit of the
Spirit” then I reason that I am in the “fruit of some other kind of spirit”. As such, I reason that there must be an open
door somewhere within my soul that is allowing the “voice” of another “spirit”
other than the “Holy Spirit” to speak into me and lead me to some form of
stinkin thinkin that is leading me into some form of thought, emotion, and
feeling that falls short of being one with God.
When this happens it reveals to me
that I am not free, but being controlled by something that I really don’t want
controlling me. So, I then turn to John
8:32. “The truth shall make you free”.
In this context, I open up my heart, mind, and soul to the Holy Spirt
revealing to me exactly where this open door is, what it is, and where it came
from. Sometimes I find that the door is
an old hurt that led to me seeing myself in a particular way that isn’t exactly
“true”. Sometimes it leads me to see the
world in a way that isn’t exactly “true”.
Sometimes I might discover that I have judged God in a way that is not
exactly “true”. Sometimes, the “truth is”
that I have put myself at the center of all things, and as such seeing things
from a self-centered position, it is impossible to see how God might be
attempting to use me in a particular circumstance. Anyway, the list goes on and on, there are
lots of lies and they all keep us captive, leave us with open doors, and put us
into a position that can, under the right circumstances, lead us to stinkin
thinkin.
So, over the past several weeks I
have been especially tuned into the pain and suffering of the world around me. The words from the Beatles song “All the
Lonely People” has just been echoing through my head. There are a few things that have led me into this
place of a greater and more heightened sense of awareness.
First is a woman that I do ministry
with. Two years ago, she lost her
son. About a month ago she lost her
husband. A few days later she was unable
to reach her daughter. She called the
police and they went to the daughter’s home and found her dead. Apparently, she had been dead for several
days putting her time of death very near the same time of death as the woman’s
husband. I will be attending his celebration
of life later today.
Another way that God is reaching me
in this area is through my own personal experience. After being in a long-term relationship for
the past 3 years, I find myself back in a position of being “single”. I have been wrestling with the emotions that
are between being “lonely” and feeling “alone”.
In this I have been looking at myself, my emotions, and my feelings. I have been using the scripture I noted above
to help keep me in my perceived balance, and have done a good job remaining
within the guidelines of the fruit that the Holy Spirit will lead us to. In my mind I was applying the more
traditional “patience” use of the word that the KJV translates as “longsuffering”.
Being transparent and vulnerable, I
will share that I see my world as kind of small. I wrestle with where we are to walk in total
faith and where God is calling us to take a proactive stance and do something. Where I land on this is that, I totally
believe that God will bring the right person into my life when the time is
right to do so. At the same time, I
believe He is looking to me to do something and not just sit at home waiting
for my phone to ring or for Him to lead the right person into my life through
some work relationship or church function.
So, in my willingness to “do my
part” I have registered with two online dating sites. From time to time I sit and skim through the pictures,
read the stories, and consider who may or may not be a good fit. Besides watching my own emotions and seeing
what kinds of women I am and am not attracted to and what is stirred within me
that leads me to that attraction, I can’t help but reading between the lines of
what they are sharing. So much of what I
read simply breaks my heart.
One of the women I came across had
a really nice write up and talked about her relationship with God. I sent her a short hello and we had a short “chat”. In that “chat” she revealed some of the
struggles she was enduring. A few days
later I followed up again and spent the next hour and a half just being an ear for
her to vent to. Her life had been
completely turned upside down. She had
suffered a divorce, gotten remarried, soon after lost that husband to brain
cancer, almost at the same time she was diagnosed with a rare disorder that put
her into a major surgery. The impacts of
that surgery have affected her entire life.
In and through all of this her friends have abandoned her, and she has
found herself alone, losing weight, and scared.
Her “religious” upbringing has her wondering why “God is angry at her
and “punishing” her”. And the words of
the song keep echoing in my head. “All
the lonely people”.
Another woman that I met is a
gifted writer. She has written some articles
for Guide Post and has shared some of what she has written. Her life too has been one of struggle, trial,
and great tribulation. She has an
amazing heart for God. She has used the
grief of her life to reach others and share with them the love of God and the
process of finding Him in these moments of despair.
In this friendly relationship, I
believe God is using her to further reveal to me this deep concept, where “longsuffering”
fits into this list of “fruit”. She and
I hit it off fairly well through our chat discussion so we decided to
meet. Prior to meeting she shared with
me that she had high expectations, that she fully believed in that magical sense
of love, and that spark that will come when God introduces us to that person
that He is leading us toward and offering us as “the one” to whom we are to “become
one” with. Well, that day came and we
did meet, and neither one of us had that spark.
I left that meeting contemplating why?
Am I too narrow minded in what “sparks” me? Is there an aspect of me that still needs to
be nailed to the cross? How many amazing
people are going through life never giving or receiving that “spark” response
simply because we have been conditioned by society, conditioned by our flesh,
conditioned by our pride to give and receive that kind of attraction from within
the confines of our pre-determined notions?
But is that fair, is that really what is going on? Maybe there is something deeper. Regardless, that’s another blog all together,
and for now, it just led me back to the song again…..”All the Lonely People”.
Last night I really came up against
the wall on this. The reality of what I am experiencing came crashing down on
me. I became one of those people. As I laid in bed, curled up in a fetal position,
crying more deeply than I remember doing almost ever before, I was flooded
with emotions. I was flooded with the
longsuffering of a life gone by, the suffering of my current state, the
inability to share these feelings with the one I truly desire to share them
with, and the long-felt response to just want to break something, to hit
something, to release the pain that was coursing through my veins, even to hurt
myself. Anything to get this paint out
of me, to move beyond the suffering. But
those thoughts and emotions simply brought more memories, memories of other
moments in my past when I felt the very same way. Ultimately, I faced the pain, faced the memories,
faced the reality, and got up and started writing. I wrote a letter, I expressed my thoughts,
and I let my feelings be heard.
Earlier in the evening I had spent
a few hours talking with my mom. We explored
some deep concepts, and I believe God used her to open up my heart to this
deeper understanding. I had shared with
her that throughout the last several years of my life I had focused on this formula
I shared above using these few sections of scripture to keep me seeing life
from a “heavenly perspective”. After
all, we have a father who loves us, who knows what is best for us, and who uses
all things for our good. Right? In my little world of understanding, this all
translates to keeping an optimistic attituded, and being proactive in this
journey with Him. This is the
transformation of the mind, right? And with
this transformation we can “rejoice in all things”.
And, yes, all of this is true, but
something was missing. In the transformation
of my mind and the renewal of my soul, I have become almost too “heavenly
minded” for my own good and for the good of those around me. As hard as it has been, I have rejoiced in the
pain I have felt over these past several days.
It has reminded me that I am human, that I am a living being, surrounded
by other living beings, and that all of us struggle with living in this
difficult and painful world.
What I have come to see is that balance
is really important and that, in Rabbi Foreman’s own style of teaching, “Longsuffering”
truly does “belong” in the list of “the fruit of the Spirit”. There was a time in my life where I simply
immersed myself in the pain, the sorrow, the helplessness, and the pessimistic
outlook of an impossible future. I would
go from mountain high to mountain low, and in those low moments I was inclined
to struggle with depression, self-pitty, anger, resentment, and a host of other
emotions that led me out of my relationship with God and others. Over the last several years of my life I have
allowed myself to feel the pains, to feel the fears, to feel the frustrations,
but too quickly move beyond those feelings as I have focused on allowing myself to
see things nearly exclusively from God’s perspective surrounding an optimistic
future. Today I am finding greater
balance as I realize how important it is to allow ourselves the opportunity to
experience longsuffering.
Isaiah 53:3 (KJV) come to mind. Speaking of Yeshua God shares through the
prophet: “He is despised and rejected of
men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief: and we hid as it were our
faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not.”
To be of the mind of God we simply must understand longsuffering
far beyond the concept of patience. With
the right “heavenly mindset” and optimistic attitude we can remain “patient”
without ever really getting in touch with that aspect of God that truly sympathizes
with us, that experiences our pain, and that is with us in the greatest of
trials.
I see the Word of God, at least in part, as the deepest
understandings of where heaven and earth intersect. It is not about the physical, and it is not
about the spiritual. It is about the
interaction of the two. And by adding longsuffering
to the list of the fruit of the Spirit, the fulness of this concept comes into
full focus. With only a heavenly and optimistic
mindset that sees everything as “good” we move beyond the physical realm of the
reality of the world we live and get so far removed from it that we miss out on
the depths of our human relationships. At the same time, if we focus solely on
the pain, joys, and experiences of this world and what this world has to offer,
we totally miss out on the experience of walking in relationship with Him. To truly be in harmony with the Spirit we
must be in touch with not only the heavenly “optimistic” perspective, but the
perspective that comes from being alive, living in this world, experiencing the
losses, and suffering the grief…this too is “heavenly”.
We have a God who love us, who sympathizes with us, who is with us
in our tears, and with us in our pain. To
deny these feelings or even to move beyond them too quickly is missing out on one
of the greatest aspects of our relationship with Him and others. For, it is in our pain that we truly understand
the depths of our love.
I pray that this blog has been a blessing to you and that if you
have found yourself too weighted on one side of the emotions or the other, that
either way, this blog has been a blessing to you. I pray that God has used my words and my
experiences to bless you this day. Amen
Amen
