Feeling Settled?

Genesis 37:1-40:23, Vayeshev, “And he settled”

This weeks reading takes us through the time period between Israel settling into the land of Canaan (where his father Isaac had lived), and into his elder years.  It is primarily focused on the lives of his children.  Specifically, the lives of Joseph and Judah.  Of course, we can’t really look into our lives without discussing the relationships that we encounter along the way.  At the end of the day, isn’t it the relationships that tend to mold us, grow us, and transform us as we progress through this experience we call life?  Sure, I could sum up my life by talking about all the things I have done, the things I have bought, the things I have sold, the things I have won, and the things I have lost.  But, would that really tell you much about my life?  So here to, I think it is important to not just look at the comings and goings of these men, but to look deeply into the relationships and interactions, and as we do, try to understand what God might be trying to communicate to each of us through the relationships of their lives.

One of the first things that came to my mind this week regarding this week’s reading is the name.  “And he settled”.  I understand how these readings are assigned names based simply off the first few words of the reading. At the same time, I like to consider how those first few words might sum up some major concept within the reading.  At first thought, I didn’t see much that fit in this week’s reading relative to “and he settled”.  Then it started opening up to me.  I realized that the word “settled” can have a few different meanings.  We can “settle” in a place to live, we can “settle” into a lifestyle, and we can “settle” for what life gives us.  Settle can take on a meaning of accepting less as in “When he sold the boat, he settled for less than it was worth”, or it can take on a meaning of something positive as in “He is so settled in his relationship with God, nothing knocks him off balance”. 

Ultimately, I came to see that in this section of reading we are given examples of all of these.  Israel “settled” in the land.  He apparently “settled” in his acceptance of the relationship between his children.  And, he settled for his own attitudes of favoritism relative to his own relationships with his wives and their children.  Several of his children were settled in their hatred toward Joseph, and Joseph was settled in what God revealed to him through his dreams and what this all meant to and for HIM.  Later, all the brothers, except Reuben, settled on a plan to kill Joseph.  After throwing him into a pit where he had no choice but to settle in until the circumstances changed, they all were so settled in spirit (after killing their own brother) that they were able to settle down to a meal and eat together as if it was all in a day’s work.  From there, they settled up with a band of Ishmaelites when they sold Joseph into slavery.  And ultimately settled on a lie and deception that they would share with their father Israel as to what happened to their brother.

From there we read about Judah's life.  Presumably, Judah was somewhat settled on his views of sexuality and in regard to how what was right for him was wrong for another.  His story unfolds with him seeing a woman who he “took and went into”.  Typically, the Word is very clear in telling us when someone “takes a wife” and when they just “go into them”, so it is reasonable to interpret this passage as Judah only sleeping with this woman and that he did not marry her.  After raising a family, life settles in for Judah.  His oldest son, Er, marries a woman named Tamar.  Er dies.  Judah understands the importance of continuing the family line of each of his sons so, he encourages his second oldest son, Onan, to go into Tamar and raise up a child in Er’s name.  Onan however wants nothing to do with continuing his older brother’s family line and acts selfishly.  He intentionally settles for his own views of righteousness and is blatantly rebellious against doing the right thing in behalf of Judah, Tamar, and his older brother Er.  For this, God was displeased and took his life from him.  Judah becomes fearful that if he gives Tamar Onan’s younger brother in the same way he gave her Onan, he too might die.  So, he settles in on his own plan of deceit and lies to Tamar about his intentions.  Later, he settles on compromise in regard to his own sexuality when he takes what he believes to be a prostitute when he is on a trip away from home.  He and this “prostitute” settle up on a deal, and they settle into bed with each other.  From there the plot thickens when Judah attempts to deliver payment and the “prostitute” can’t be found.  In this case he gives up the search for her and settles for not being able to repay his debt.  Later, he finds out that Tamar was pregnant out of wedlock and settles for his own hypocritical views as he accuses her of being a harlot deserving of burning.  Ultimately, he discovers that the child is his when Tamar proves that he is the one who impregnated her when she tricked him into sleeping with her.  This leads him into a place of deep introspection where he settles into what God has used all this to show him, he is humbled, and sees his gross unrighteousness.  Through all of this it is interesting to me that Tamar knew Judah well enough to know that all she had to do is show up as a prostitute and he would sleep with her.  It kind of gives me the impression that maybe this was more than a one-time thing for him.  It is also interesting that Tamar was used by God in a way very similar to how God used Rebekah and Laban in their deceitful plans and how each of these characters were so settled in their plans of deceit and manipulation.

Moving on, the reading takes us back to the life of Joseph.  We learn that he ends up in the home of Potiphar.  Potiphar is a high up official in the ranks of Egypt.  Potiphar has a wife who settles her eye on Joseph and decides she wants to sleep with him.  Joseph is settled in his ways and understands that compromising would bring discredit to God.  Ultimately, Potiphar’s wife becomes enraged when Joseph rejects her, she lies about what happened, and settles in on her own selfishness as she stands by and watches Joseph get thrown into prison for something he did not do.  I have to believe that Potiphar knows what is going on or he would have had Joseph killed.  As such, Potiphar settles for compromise when he chooses to save his own reputation and not deal with the deceitfulness of his wife.  The story continues as Joseph is forced to settle into the life of a well-favored prisoner.  Through all of this it appears as though he is well settled in his relationship with God and trust in Him. At the same time, when given the opportunity to self-promote on the coat tails of the revelations God has given him relative to dream interpretation, he attempts to do so. This, I believe is the same pattern he had as a youth when he settled in on the image of his entire family bowing down to him.  Ultimately, he is forced to settle for another life blow when his attempt to self-promote fails when the cup bearer does not remember him before Pharaoh.  In this, the cup bearer, in his selfishness, settles right back into the life he had before being thrown into prison and meeting Joseph.

Believe it or not, there are many more levels of “settling” that I was seeing throughout this summary that I just couldn’t go into.  This summary is long enough and I think the point has been made.  The reality is, life is a never-ending series of opportunities to “settle”.  Sometimes settling can be a positive thing, sometimes it can be a negative thing.  Regardless, the most important thing is knowing when we are doing it.  So often, we go through life not even realizing that we are settled.  Sometimes we don’t realize that we are not settled and that maybe we should be.  Sometimes we know that we should, but we just don’t have the character to be so.

Ultimately, there are some questions that we can draw from this week’s readings as we give it the opportunity to speak into our lives:

• Are we settled into our approach to family relationships that we know show favoritism and/or dynamics that lead to hurt and perpetuates dysfunction in the lives of our loved ones?
• Are there areas in our lives where we have settled into how we view ourselves while deep down inside knowing that how we view ourselves simply isn’t true or healthy?
• Are there areas in our lives where we are settled over how we hold onto unforgiveness, resentment, or hatred?
• Are we settling for a thought life that does nothing more than lead us into places of temptation, bitterness, envy, and a thankless approach to life?
• Are we settled in how we respond to these thoughts and how those thoughts lead us to justifying lying, deceitfulness, conspiracy, manipulation, or some sort of addictive behavior?
• Are there areas in our lives where we are perpetually in stress and anxiety while never being able to find peace and a place of being settled in the circumstances that life has us?
• Are there times that we settle for compromise when we know that God has called us to a higher level of living?
• Do our moment-by-moment decisions provide proof that we have settled for a life that is far below where God has called us to be, what He has created us for, who He knows we are capable of becoming, or a life free of the bondages we have lost hope of overcoming?
• Do we settle on our views of things in such a way that hinders us in our ability to understand others or be open to new understandings and growth?
• Are there areas where we are settled in on our own needs to self-promote even though we know that this need is coming from a place of woundedness or from a lack of faith?

Ultimately, we must come to understand that every day we have countless opportunities to see where we have settled, where those areas of settlement are good, and where they are not so good.  Every day we have the opportunity to move beyond those areas that are not so good, and settle on making some changes.  I pray that this blog has been an eye opener to some area of your life that God has called you to move on, to break a pattern of settling, and to become more settled in Him.  I pray that you lean on His strength as He holds you by the hand and leads you along the way.  I pray that none of us ever become stagnate in this relationship with Him and that we are ever remaining open to moving beyond those places where we have had a tendency to settle.

Beyond the Barter

Genesis 32:4-36:43, Vayishlach, “And he sent”

This week’s reading picks up in the story of Jacob, with his family, as they travel back to Jacob’s homeland.  Jacob has settled things with Laban and sends word to Esau.  The message is intended to let Esau know that Jacob would like for Esau to greet him with favor.  The only other thing included in the message is that Jacob has the messengers tell Esau that he has spent the last twenty years with Laban and he is now wealthy.

I can’t help but wonder what Jacob was thinking.  The last he knew; Esau was still really angry with him.  I wonder why he thought the announcement of his wealth and a simple request to be seen with favor would actually bring about that result.  Regardless, the messengers return with a message from Esau.  They tell Jacob that Esau is going to come to meet him and that he is bringing 400 men with him.

The thought of this leads to Jacob becoming afraid and distressed.  In this place of fear, he divided all that he had into two companies.  He reasoned that if Esau attacked one company, then the other would escape.  AFTER doing this Jacob went before God with the following prayer:

Jacob said, "O God of my father Abraham and God of my father Isaac, O LORD, who said to me, 'Return to your country and to your relatives, and I will prosper you,' I am unworthy of all the lovingkindness and of all the faithfulness which You have shown to Your servant; for with my staff [only] I crossed this Jordan, and now I have become two companies.  "Deliver me, I pray, from the hand of my brother, from the hand of Esau; for I fear him, that he will come and attack me [and] the mothers with the children.  "For You said, 'I will surely prosper you and make your descendants as the sand of the sea, which is too great to be numbered.'" Genesis 32:9-12 NASB

In this place of total fear and distress he first leans on his own understanding, but then turns to the Lord in prayer.  In this prayer he acknowledges that he is unworthy of the favor that God has shown him, and gives full credit for the great wealth that he now has to Him.  There is no hint of any kind of grumbling or discontent with the difficulties of the last twenty years of his life, and there is nothing but thanksgiving.  He is open with God about his fears, and even leans on the promises of God showing faith that God is true to His promises.

Before he gives God the chance to honor his prayers, the very next day, Jacob takes things back into his own hands.  He decides to send three droves of livestock consisting of 550 plus animals as a ‘gift” to Esau. He sends this “gift” to Esau with the intent of “appeasing” him.  

From there, the scriptures tell us that the very same night that the droves of animals were sent out of the camp, Jacob arose, separated himself from all that he had, was left by himself, and subsequently spent the rest of the night wrestling with a “man’.  The “man” was not able to defeat Jacob so he touched Jacob’s thigh socket and dislocated it.  Jacob insisted on being blessed, the ‘man’ asked Jacob his name, Jacob said ‘Jacob” and the "man" told Jacob that he would no longer be called Jacob, but ‘Israel”.  When he gives Jacob this new name, he tells him that the new name is based on the fact that ‘he has striven with God and with man and has prevailed’.  Israel askes the “man” his name, the “man” does not say, but he does bless Israel.  Israel names the place Peniel based on his view that “I have seen God face to face, but my life has been preserved”.

I don't think anyone could argue that this is a major milestone in Jacob's life.  At the same time, I think the truth is, Jacob was changing all along.  Maybe Jacob had been striving with God longer than we can see from the outside.  Maybe, he prevailed before we could really see the change manifesting in his life choices.  As we move forward, let's read between the lines and see what we might have missed that was an important part of allowing Jacob to become Israel.  In the process, maybe we can learn some things that we can apply to our own relationship with God.

The first thing I pick up on is what happens when Esau shows up and they are about to meet.  Even though Israel puts his favored wife and children behind his less favored wife and children which were behind his least favored children and the maid servants who bore them, he went out in front and approached Esau himself.  When I read this my mind went to Abraham going down to Egypt, then Abraham going to Gerar (where Abimelech was king), and then when Isaac went to Gerar. In all three of these cases Abraham and Isaac were both fearful and sacrificed their wives to protect themselves.  I wonder if “Jacob” would have hidden behind his wives just like Abraham and Isaac hid behind there’s.  What we do know is that Israel didn’t.  Even though he was fearful, he approached his brother first.

The next thig that jumps out is what happens next.  After Esau runs to Israel, embraces him, and kisses his neck, they weep.  At this point Israel introduces Esau to his maids, wives, and children.  As each is introduced, they bow down to Esau.  Finally, Israel and Rachel approach Esau last and do likewise (bow down before him).  With a little help form a teaching from Rabbi Foreman at Aleph Beta, I am convinced that this final gesture is truly sincere and that at this point Israel was no longer attempting to appease or manipulate.  I believe he was in fact, in some small way, saying “I’m sorry”, and attempting to, through this gesture, “return” to Esau the blessings that he had received from Isaac during the deception.  When we go back and look at that blessing, we notice that it included “May peoples serve you, and nations bow down to you; Be master of your brothers, and may your mother's sons bow down to you.”

All of the animal gifts that were sent to buy his brother’s forgiveness simply did not carry an image of repentance.  Repentance isn’t just about feeling bad about something because we don’t like the results as they apply to us.  Repentance includes doing what we can to right the wrongs done to others and changing our behaviors in such a way that we don’t impact others in the same way again.  In the simplicity of having all his family bow down to Esau and then ultimately bowing down to him himself, Israel is in essence saying, “I give you back what I took from you through deceit”.

In this God shows us that Israel truly had wrested with man and God and that he had prevailed.  Through the course of twenty years, I believe that Jacob had leaned on his own strength, his own wisdom, and his own talents.  I think he had worked tirelessly, and God blessed those efforts.  Ultimately, I think he came to the place where he knew that all that work, all that effort, and all that pain was hanging in the balance.  All his dreams of returning to the land of his fathers, with his wives, with his children, and with his wealth all hinged on getting passed Esau.  And in that moment of truth, I think he knew that there was nothing he could do. 

Ultimately, I believe he had to accept that he was totally dependent on God.  When I think back to the if/then deal that Jacob made with God as he was just beginning this journey, I see a man who believed that he was still in control.  “OK God, I know you want me to worship you, so let’s make a deal, if you do all these things for me, I will do that one thing for you.”  And God went right along with that agreement right up to the eleventh hour and then he called Jacob’s bluff.  “OK Jacob, now what are you going to do?”  “Will you make me your God before I deliver you back to the land?”  “Or, are you going to go at this yourself and see if I bless you in your ways?”  In the end Jacob had no choice but to simply go before God in humility.  In this later prayer we see no hint of any kind of bargaining, pride, or grumbling.  We simply see a man broken, humble, and in full awareness of his total dependency on God.  He was finally starting to see God for who He is.

The thing that I am seeing the most as I get to the end of this story is that one of our biggest “wrestling” matches with God is getting beyond the belief that he is asking anything of us.  This is another aspect of “seeing His face”.  At the end of the day, we simply don’t have anything to offer Him.  At this pinnacle moment, Jacob prayed to God and offered God nothing in return for what he was asking.  He simply asked.  Maybe this is what the point of this story is really all about.  Jacob’s entire life had been about bargaining, deception, manipulation, and deals.  This isn’t who God is, and no matter how much we try to approach Him in this way, He simply won’t bite.  He simply loves us, wants to bless us, and wants us to live in a way that is free from the entanglements of this world.

With all this in mind, let's go back to that moment when Jacob reached out to God in prayer.  I'm going to go back to the point that Jacob was crediting God with all that he had acquired and that there was no grumbling or self-righteousness in his prayer.  I have to wonder if through those twenty years with Laban, Jacob had some discussions with God where there was some grumbling, some strong words, and some self-righteousness.  I guess we will never know, but I have to believe that there were.  I have been there, and I have gotten frustrated, I have called out to God, and I have said "Why me?"  I think this is another aspect of our "wrestling" with God, where in the end, we simply have to accept that He is more interested in growing our character than giving us our desires and making life easy.  I think Jacob had been striving with God long before the "man" met him in the night.  I'm thinking that what happened that night was just God putting the icing on a cake that had been baking already for a long time.

As we close this time together, I can’t help but seeing where there are so many places where this week’s readings have the potential to speak to us.  With this in mind, I pray that each of us take the time to look deep within and ask ourselves some really pointed questions, that we allow God to speak to us through those questions, and that as we hear what God is attempting to reveal, we lean on Him to have the strength to know how to move beyond what He is showing us and into something new.  Here are some questions to get us started:

• When we are in the midst of struggle, do we tend to question God's love, or do we lean on His strength as He uses the circumstances of life to mature us into all that He knows we can be?
• Are there areas in our lives where we are allowing fear or anxiety to lead us into getting out in front of God and taking things into our own hands?
• Are there things that we do or think that are following the dysfunctional patterns of our ancestors?
• Are there times in our lives when we are still wrestling with people and not seeing God’s hand of love working behind the scenes?
• Are there areas in our relationship with God that are still coming from an if/then mindset?
• Is there anything that we desire more than truly seeing "His face"?

It Just Takes Time

 Genesis 28:10-32:3, Vayetze, And He Left

This week’s reading is so jammed packed with deep and thought-provoking imagery that it is hard to know just where to start. 

For me, entering into this week’s reading, I am carrying the theme of introspection, vulnerability, and transformation.  These concepts are deeply rooted in a life of faith and dedication that overwhelms our natural tendencies toward selfishness and a flesh led perspective on time, space, and relationships.  I come off last week’s readings seeing Rebekah struggling through the dynamic of seeing Isaac’s favoritism of Esau and responding with her own favoritism of Jacob.  I see Isaac making the same mistakes as Abraham while adding a few of his own.  I see Jacob and Esau working through their own challenges of life and relationship while experiencing the same kind of family dynamics that can be so typical in a society that is focused on physical principles, comparison, measuring-up, and favoritism while being dominated by desire, fear, and all those other emotions that tend to drive our every decision.

With all this, last week’s reading ends with a few short verses that reveal a potential understanding that through Rebekah’s manipulation and subsequent expression of total frustration, Isaac is led to opening his eyes to what he has never seen.  This leads to Esau opening his eyes to some things that he too had never seen.  Ultimately both make moves in directions that, as far as we know, they had never moved. 

For Isaac, he freely, with total awareness, passes along the blessings of Abraham to Jacob.  For Esau, he appears to acknowledge his own disregard of the value and responsibilities that come along with being the elder son, and makes a choice to marry a woman who is at least in some form the image of what would be proper.

Following this train of thought, we enter into this week’s reading, by reading between the lines, seeing Rebekah’s introspection as she moves into a place of seeing why she led Jacob into deceiving Isaac.  She makes herself vulnerable when she shares those feelings, and she leaves room for transformation of the entire family as she waits to see how they respond.  I would argue that this moves Isaac into self-reflection of how he had favored Esau in spite of so much evidence that would stand contrary to him doing so.  I believe in that moment, through this self-reflection, Isaac was able to see some flaws in himself, and in faith to truth, was set free to pass the blessings of Abraham on to the one chosen by God from the beginning.  In this, I see Esau taking a long pause.  I can only imagine how that rocked his world.  It would have had to have been so much greater than the deceit of Jacob and Rebekah.  He sat by and watched Isaac move his favoritism from him to his brother.  In a blink of an eye, everything changed.  I believe this stirred something very deep in Esau, and just like Rebekah and Isaac, he was willing to see truth, he was willing to see himself for who he had been, and he was able to take some responsibility, and start moving in a bit of a different direction.

It is with this that we enter this week’s reading.  For me, I am seeing that of the four, we aren’t really left with any information as to Jacob’s spiritual journey through this experience.  So, I enter this week’s reading with anticipation as to what the Word is going to reveal in regard to introspection, vulnerability, and transformation relative to Jacob’s life.

I love how this week’s reading opens with God confirming that the blessings that Isaac sent Jacob out with truly had been transferred to him.  At the same time, I appreciate how Jacob responds with the “if/then” statement of “Then Jacob made a vow, saying, "If God will be with me and will keep me on this journey that I take, and will give me food to eat and garments to wear, and I return to my father's house in safety, then the LORD will be my God.” (Gen 28:20-21).

At this point, I see Jacob still in that position of treating God as if he would be just like all the pagan gods.  “Hey God, if you do this for me, I’ll do this for you.”  From there, Jacob ends up in the region of Laban where he was to take a wife from the family of Rebekah.  As we discover, Jacob sees Rachel and shows her favoritism over her older sister Leah.  Jacob and Laban agree that Jacob will work for seven years upon which at the end of the seven years he will be given Rachel in marriage.  However, Laban tricks Jacob and in the dark of night Leah is substituted for Rachel and Jacob consummates the marriage with Leah.  Laban explains why he deceived Jacob; they agree that for another seven years labor Jacob could have Rachel as a wife.  This time, the waiting period is only a week.  They agree to the deal, Jacob marries Rachel, and follows through on his promise to work another seven years.   Through the course of the next seven years twelve children are born to Jacob.  The summary of these children is, one son from Rachel, two sons from Rachel’s maid servant, two sons from Leah’s maid servant, six sons from Leah, and one daughter from Leah.  Most of the children are born out of a competition between the women.  After Rachel has her son Jacob apparently has finished serving the seven-year agreement for acquiring Rachel as his wife from Laban.  Jacob goes to Laban and asks to leave and return to the land from where he had come.  Laban talks Jacob into staying and Jacob ends up staying another six years.  At the end of this six years, we read that Laban has cheated Jacob and changed his wages ten times through the course of their relationship.  Ultimately, Jacob breaks away from Laban, takes the wealth that he has acquired, his wives, and his children and makes way for home.  In this, Rachel takes her father’s family idols and hides them in her luggage.  Laban chases after them, the idols are not found, and Laban and Jacob make a covenant with each other.  From there, Jacob and his family continue on their way and ultimately are joined by the angels of God. 

Just as this week’s portion opens with God confirming that Jacob is the one whom through the blessings of Abraham would continue, the reading ends with the angels of God meeting him on his journey back home.  It is at this point that Jacob sends messengers to is brother Esau.  We discover that Esau is living in Seir which is in the country of Edom.

As we turn our sights to Jacob, I can’t help but wondering what he is thinking when he sends messengers to his brother Esau.  The last he had heard, Esau wanted to kill him.  If we ignore everything we know about the story we have to accept that we just don’t know what Jacob is thinking.  Is Jacob going to try to pull another deception?  Has he learned anything?  Is he trusting in his own strength or has the interactions that he has had with God over the last 20 years taught him anything?  Has his character changed?  Does he even know what is actually going on with all the emotions that are flying around within him?

We simply don’t know the answers to any of these questions, and this is really a beautiful place to be. 

The truth is, there are many times in life that we go through long periods of preparation and refinement.  To the outside observer or maybe even to ourselves it may look like nothing has changed.  But, deep within change has occurred.  It just hasn’t had the opportunity to make itself known.

This really makes me think about how life really works and gives me encouragement as I look at myself and those around me.  Sometimes I can get really impatient with myself and with others.  I started this blog off by stating that I was expectant on what would happen in Jacob’s life.  I wanted to see where Jacob was going to became introspective, where he was going to make himself vulnerable, and what his amazing transformation was going to look like.  At the end of the reading, I am really no closer to those answers than where we began.

Stories like this remind me that sometimes it takes a lot of preparation deep within before the refinements start showing up externally.  At the same time, it is in those blink of an eye moments of great challenge that we finally discover who we and/or those around us have become.  

As I leave this reading and wait for next week’s, I am left in the same place that I find myself so often in life.  Have I changed?  Have I learned anything?  Am I going to try the same things that I have in the past only to get the same results?  Have I learned to trust in God and to not lean on my own strength?  With all these questions, will I step into the next experience with a little more courage knowing that maybe, just maybe, God as a real surprise in store for me.  Maybe he will use something really tough to show me that I have changed, maybe he will show me someone else has, and maybe what appears to be so overwhelming will be the very thing that leads to the greatest moments of introspection, vulnerability, and transformation as the seeds of a journey are brought to life through the tears of our human struggles.

I pray that this blog has been a blessing to you, that you are seeing areas where God has been planting seeds, and that through the struggles of life He will bring what He has been planting into fruition.  Maybe in your life, maybe in the life of someone you know.  Amen

 

 

It's A Family Thing

 Genesis 25:19-28:9, Toldot, Generations

When I think about “generations”, a few things come to mind.  I think of birthdays, weddings, family gatherings, and special events that tend to bring a family together, to catch up, and to reconnect.  It is during these moments in time that family members gather together, pictures are taken, and for a moment the images of those from various times are captured together providing memories to pass along to the next generations who may never have a chance to meet those who came before them.  I think about how these pictures are used to reveal the facial characteristics of a child or young adult as being linked to the generations of the particular family. 

At the same time, when I think about “generations” I think about all those things that pictures do not capture.  It is amazing how children repeat the patterns of our parents, how we struggle with the same things, and how we tend to be strong in the same areas of strength.  From this we get the phrase that an “apple doesn’t fall too far from the tree the produced it”.  At the same time, there are those that are different, who just don’t seem to fit in, and who seem to have fallen from a tree totally unlike the parents from whom they came.

This week’s Torah portion covers all of this and so much more.  In this parsha we find Isaac repeating the same pattern as his father Abraham in telling Abimelech that Rebekah, his wife, was merely his sister.  Not only does he tell the same king the same lie, he does it for the same reasons; he was fearful that if he told them she was his wife, they would kill him.  In the same way that God used Abraham’s fear and trusting in his own ways to bless him, so too does God bless Isaac when he makes the same mistakes. 

Interestingly, Rebekah was barren just like Abraham’s wife Sarah was barren.  Ultimately, just like Sarah, God intervened and Rebekah became pregnant.  In this, and in so many other ways, we can see how in spite of Isaac’s flaws, just like Abraham, God was with Him.  Several times, through the course of the reading, we are reminded of that relationship.  For me, this is what this parsha really comes down to and from a spiritual perspective, what I think about when I think of “generations”.

So often we believe that we need to make the right decisions, do the right things, say the right things, and make all the right moves.  It is so easy to believe that if we mess up and do something wrong, everything is going to fall apart and the end result will be a catastrophe.  What we see in this parsha is something very different.  What we see in Abraham’s life, and in what gets extended into Isaac’s is a pattern of action/reaction that simply does not make sense.  It is a pattern of action/reaction this is founded on the divine intervention of God and not simply based on the patterns of life that we would tend to see and expect.

As we continue reading in this week’s study, we find that God tells Rebekah that the younger of the two sons will be the one to rule over the older of the two.  Later we come to learn a little about the two boys.  The older is a manly man by today’s standards.  He is the kind of boy most fathers would tend to favor, you know the athlete, the one who knows how to hunt, fish, play football, throw a baseball, and work on cars.  At the same time, the younger son, by today’s standards, is one of those kids that just doesn’t seem to fit in with the rest of the boys.  He is the one who hangs out inside all the time.  He cooks, and reads, and hangs out with the girls.  When it comes to hunting, fishing, and the “guy” stuff, he just falls short.

Just like most parents, Isaac tends to favor the older son while Rebekah tends to favor the younger.  Their names are Esau and Jacob.  As the story unfolds, we read about Jacob taking advantage of Esau’s hunger and using the moment to barter the birthright away from him.  In this we see Esau’s lack of spirituality and/or appreciation of the birthright.  A little later in the story we find Esau taking on two Hitite women as wives.

When I think of “birthright” I tend to think of the double portion of the family inheritance and all the blessings that come with being the “favored” son.  As I read how Esau’s selection of wives brought grief to Rebekah and Isaac, I started to see something different.  I started thinking about the responsibility that comes with the one who is to be “favored”.  Ultimately, it is the son who carries the birth-right, that is also the one who carries the responsibility to ensure the right-births, and to ensure the proper extension of the “generations” and the family name into the future.

In spite of everything Isaac was seeing, he was still set to bless Esau with the blessing due the favored son.  The story picks up when Isaac is old and believing he is near death.  In this moment, Isaac asks Esau to hunt fresh game and prepare him a meal whereby upon the delivery he would bless him.  Rebekah takes the opportunity to convince Jacob to deceive his father, Isaac is deceived, and Jacob gets the blessing of the favored son. 

A little bit later Esau returns, Isaac discovers that he has been deceived, Esau becomes very angry, he asks his father to bless him, and Isaac offers Esau a token blessing.

In the heat of all this Rebekah tells Jacob to go to her brother’s land to stay for a time to allow the anger of Esau to subside.  But then she adds something very important.  In referring to Esau’s Hitite wives, Rebekah said to Isaac, “I am tired of living because of the daughters of Heth; if Jacob takes a wife from the daughters of Heth, like these, from the daughters of the land, what good will my life be to me?” (Genesis 27:46 NASB). 

Following that, Isaac does something that I find very interesting.  He extends the blessing that he had already given Jacob under deception with an even greater blessing under full disclosure.  It is a blessing that he knew he had to offer and did not extend to Esau.  It is given to is in Genesis 28:1-4 as follows.

“So Isaac called Jacob and blessed him and charged him, and said to him, "You shall not take a wife from the daughters of Canaan. "Arise, go to Paddan-aram, to the house of Bethuel your mother's father; and from there take to yourself a wife from the daughters of Laban your mother's brother. "May God Almighty bless you and make you fruitful and multiply you, that you may become a company of peoples. "May He also give you the blessing of Abraham, to you and to your descendants with you, that you may possess the land of your sojournings, which God gave to Abraham." (Genesis 28:1-4 NASB)

In this, not only has Isaac given Jacob the blessing of his own family, but he is passing on the blessings that God made to Abraham. 

The parsha ends with Esau seeing all these things take place.  He sees his mother speak of the pain his choices have brought into the family dynamic, he sees his father extend this greater blessing to his younger brother, he sees his younger brother accept the directions of his parents, and more importantly, he sees the error of his own ways.  He sees that his choice in wives had brought grief to his parents and seeks out what he perceives to be a proper wife from the descendants of Abraham and marries her.

There are so many things that I like about this story.  I like how the son who never really got the father’s favor, ultimately got it.  I like how the father who never really saw the value in the younger son, finally saw it, and did right by it.  I like how the father was able to hear the pain of his wife and understand why she did what she did.  I like how the wife had the courage to share her emotions in spite of the risk of being rejected.  I like how the older son was finally at least starting to take some responsibility for his own choices and moving beyond a victim mind set.  And I like how this is a story of redemption where a highly dysfunctional family made some really good moves and in that process God opened up their eyes and they started seeing things that they had never seen.  It is a story that reminds me of the thief on the cross next to Yeshua.  In the man’s acceptance of his fate, Yeshua looked at him and said, “today you will be with me in paradise.”

This truly is what it is to be blessed to be chosen by God to be of the “generations” of Abraham.  Through accepting Yeshua all those who believe are freely grafted into his “generations” just as those who are of direct descent.  It is a family where action/reaction just doesn’t always make sense, where things change in the blink of an eye, and where in the end, God’s will be done.  In being a part of the “generations” of Abraham we will not be free of fear, being led by our emotions, or making choices based on the physical principles of this world.  But in the end, we will be blessed knowing that He will use all things for good, and that our part is simply growing in humility and always being open to change.

To me this is what this story is all about.  It is a story that we can all relate to.  It is simply a story of life.  Through life things happen.  Sometimes we are the victims.  Sometime we are the ones taking advantage of others.  Ultimately, God’s plan will work its way out, and in the process, we will be given the opportunity to grow, to take responsibility for or own actions, and maybe have the chance to make things right.  I pray that when those moments come, we all have the eyes to “see” and the ears to “hear” and that as we see and hear, we ultimately have the strength to do what Isaac did, to do the right thing, to turn back from what we have done in the past, and to do a new thing moving forward.  Who knows what might come of it?  I bet Isaac and Rebekah were shocked to see Esau’s response and his change of heart.

I pray that this has been a blessing to you and that if you are seeing some things that you need to set “right” that you have the strength to do so.  If there are some things to let go of, that you let go.  I pray that your generations be blessed, and that your generations are a blessing to you.  Amen